Unconditional Love

I woke up this morning(if u call 1145am is morning) thinking of my mom...
Partly because I've been reading other people's blog talking about their parents...
But the main reason is because of my encounter with my dad's cousin yesterday...someone whom I might have met some 20years ago...and never since..
To those who doesn't know, my parents split up when I was 5(I think)... and I haven't seen much of my dad ever since...I wouldn't blame my parents for this but if I were to point a finger, I have to say it's more of my dad's family's fault...nevertheless, I believe what happened was for the best...I thank my mom for never makes us feel inadequate....I couldn't ask for more from her...
And my dad, I know he wasn't himself when everything happened and he still wasn't the complete person he used to be even now...
Since I don't know most of my relatives on my dad's side...and because I know they weren't nice to my mom when my parents were together and god knows what they might have talked behind my mom's back, I felt it was always confronting to be around them...
Yesterday, I was asked by my dad's cousin's wife if my mom remarried? and I tried to be as composed as I can and I answered politely, "No"....she went on saying that she went for a meeting in Terengganu some 4 yrs ago and she was told that my mom is married to a contractor...I was like, what??We weren't even in Terengganu, my mom was the vice principal in MRSM Langkawi at that time...I was mad at how people can made such things up even when it was so untrue...even if she's married, then what?even at 52, she's hot & single...she has every right to get married again....even my dad remarries and last time I checked he has 3 children...
Anyway, the husband then continued giving advice to me about how I should make efforts to go and see my dad...he was surprised when I told him that my sisters went to visit my dad last Eid...I didn't because I was in Melbourne...he even joked, "Who knows, you might be posted to GHKB when you become a doctor and then you can stay with your dad, he lives close to the hospital"...everyone who knows me would know how much I want to be with my mom...certainly I wouldn't be applying to work in KB....(unless my mom works in KB or I'm married to a Kelantanese...which hopefully won't happen)...
I hate it when people try to talk me into seeing my dad more often...some would say, "whatever it is, U should realize that U won't be here because of him" and some would push even further by saying, "U know when U wanna get married, U will need your dad as wali"...Ohh please people, I'm a mature adult...I would know that...even if I haven't seen my dad for years I would want my future husband to seek my dad's approval...I wouldn't marry someone that he disapproves...even though I would want my mom's approval more than his...(no question about my mom's place in my heart compared to his)...
Nonetheless, from the meeting yesterday, I discovered something about myself..I have Afghan blood in me...I was told that my great-grandfather is an Afghan jeweler who had 49 wives(I doubt that!)...as Asma' put it,"that explains your taste for middle-eastern looking guy"....ahahhahaha...
Talking about my mom makes me misses her more but talking about my dad doesn't really make me feel that way...It's not that I don't love him, of course I do...he's my dad...sometimes when I see a diabetic patient, I wonder how he's managing himself, being the headstrong him..(I'm pretty sure talking him into giving up sweet foods is gonna be tough)..I do think of seeing him every time I go home but often, I delay it till I don't have much time left and I end up not going at all..I make sure that it will be one of my to-do-list the next time I'm in Malaysia...
I think I'm gonna call my mom after this to report on what happened yesterday..hopefully I can reach her...It's always hard trying to reach her as we live in MRSM Besut where reception is terrible...I'm always excited when I heard the ringing instead of the monotonous, "this is the voice mailbox for the number...zero-one-nine-two-six-four-five-eight-eight-nine...you can leave your message after the tone"....I hate that voice!!


PS, I love you!